ARCHIE IN THE STUDIO: THE YEAR 2005
Presents
DESTINATION: SUGARTOWN!
THE ARCHIE RECORDS STORY
A Journey Through
THE GREAT AMERICAN
ROCK ‘N’ ROLL SONG BOOK
SABRINA: IN JANUARY OF 2005, RAJ PATEL CONVINCED JUGHEAD + KEVIN KELLER TO STAR IN A CABLE TV SPECIAL. IT WAS A TRIBUTE TO MOTOWN LEGEND MARVIN GAYE, SHOT ON LOCATION IN NEW ORLEANS AND DETROIT. KELLY HAD LITTLE ACTING EXPERIENCE AND JUGGY DIDN'T HAVE ANY TO SPEAK OF; BUT RAJ SAW A POWERFUL, NATURAL CHARISMA IN THEIR PAIRING THAT ALL BUT BEGGED TO BE FILMED! "DON'T WORRY ABOUT TRYING TO BE STARS," HE TOLD THEM. "JUST DO WHAT COMES NATURALLY! FORGET ABOUT THE CAMERAS AND ENJOY YOURSELVES." THEY PERFORMED AS A DUO CALLED BLUE-EYED SOUL, WITH SPECIAL GUESTS INCLUDING JOSIE + THE PUSSY CATS AND THE TONI TOPAZ DANCERS.
THE TV SPECIAL SCORED A SURPRISE RATINGS HIT, AND AN ARCHIES' SPINOFF ACT WAS OFFICIALLY LAUNCHED! LIKE JUGHEAD’S SOLO ALBUM, THE SOUNDTRACK CD FOR "MARV-ELOUS!" WAS A PEERLESS RECORDS RELEASE, BUT THIS ONE WAS FAR MORE SUCCESSFUL: IT CRACKED THE TOP THIRTY ON BILLBOARD'S POP ALBUMS LIST! JUGGY AND KELLY REALLY DID MARVIN'S LEGACY JUSTICE SINGING CLASSICS LIKE "PRIDE AND JOY", "AIN'T THAT PECULIAR", "I HEARD IT THROUGH THE GRAPEVINE", AND "INNER CITY BLUES".
ARCHIE BADLY WANTED BLUE-EYED SOUL FOR HIS ARTIST ROSTER, BUT KEVIN KELLER BALKED @ BECOMING A PROFESSIONAL SINGER. HE WASN'T INTERESTED IN DOING ANY MORE MUSICAL VARIETY SHOWS; FOR HIM, THE GAYE TRIBUTE WAS JUST A ONE-OFF PROJECT. KELLY SAID HE WAS CONTENT STAYING BEHIND THE SCENES, PLAYING KEYBOARDS AND SINGING BACKGROUND VOCALS ON ARCHIES ALBUMS. THIS LEFT HIM WITH PLENTY OF TIME TO PURSUE THE ACTING CAREER HE CRAVED!
ARCHIE + VERONICA DIDN’T HAVE TIME TO BROOD OVER THEIR INABILITY TO SIGN BLUE-EYED SOUL. IN EARLY 2005, THEY WERE IN A CELEBRATORY MOOD AFTER PURCHASING THE ARCHIES' EARLY MUSIC CATALOG! THE COUPLE WAS ALSO BUSY INTRODUCING AN EXCITING NEW ACT THAT RONI HAD DISCOVERED.
THE FIFTH YEAR: 2005
ALBUM SESSIONS
"MOTOWN FOREVER"
A RALFI CHINGAS PRODUCTION
(VOCALS + INSTRUMENTALS)
JANUARY 14, 15, 17 - 23, FEBRUARY 4 - 10,
MARCH 1, 2, 2005
SPANISH EDDIE’S BAR + GRILL,
NEW ORLEANS, LOUISIANA
BABY, DON’T YOU DO IT! - unreleased
BACK IN MY ARMS AGAIN - unreleased
THIS OLD HEART OF MINE - unreleased
COME SEE ABOUT ME - unreleased
YOU LOST THE SWEETEST BOY - unreleased
WITHOUT THE ONE YOU LOVE - unreleased
YOU KEEP ME HANGIN’ ON - unreleased
QUICKSAND - unreleased
ASK ANY GIRL- unreleased
MICKEY’S MONKEY - unreleased
ROCK ME FOR A LITTLE WHILE - unreleased
I’LL TURN TO STONE - unreleased
NOTHING BUT HEARTACHES - unreleased
SOMETHING ABOUT YOU, BABY - unreleased
(Dozier, Holland)
THE CANDYHEARTS
w/THE BINGOS
Vocal Arrangers:
THE CANDYHEARTS
Arranger: ROD MACK
Music Director: REY COCHINO
Producer: RALFI CHINGAS
Sound Engineer: EDDIE ROXCHILD
Executive Producer:
NICHOLAS FREUND
Salem da Katt: Spanish Eddie’s Bar + Grill was located on the top floor of a seedy Gay bar in New Orleans' French Quarter. Believe it or not, the place doubled as an audio facility during daytime hours! A hovel of a studio, it was the last place you’d expect to find The Archies.
They used it for the first time out of necessity, when a fire gutted the studio they’d originally booked. As unlikely as it seems, Veronica fell in love with the grungy ambiance and especially the crystal-clear acoustics of “Spanish” Eddie Roxchild’s music room. From 2004 on, it became a regular scene for Archies recording activities.
That first booking was a demo session in July of 2004; The Archies were on tour and it was more convenient to track in New Orleans than fly back to Mamaroneck. As the band was leaving, Roni saw Eddie’s security guard shooing three Filipino girls away from the back door. “I keep telling you, asshole,” one of them screamed, “we’re singers! Why won’t you let us audition?” The guard wasn’t buying it: “On what planet? You’re just three skank hoes from the neighborhood. Haul ass!”
But Veronica thought they deserved a chance to prove their claim. Telling them who she was, she challenged the girls to audition for her right on the spot! Fearlessly, the sisters broke into a soaring rendition of an old Diana Ross + The Supremes hit called “Forever Came Today.” The harmonies were perfect, and the lead singer was simply phenomenal!
The Archies’ flight out of New Orleans had three extra passengers on board: Sherry “Sugar Walls”, Edna “Aqua Vulva” and Francine “Flame” Evangelista! They sang background for the band on their remaining concert dates. Then The Evangelista sisters flew back to Mamaroneck with Archie + Roni, where they were signed as a girl group to Archie Records. It was the label's first major signing since The Archies.
The Evangelistas had a real-life Cinderella story that Archie's publicity machine exploited the hell out of, all except for a very important detail: The women hadn’t just been mistaken for prostitutes - they actually were! That’s why Aqua Vulva, Flame and Sugar billed themselves as “Poon Tang Posse!” A name change was obviously in order!
Archies tour manager Arsenio "Kix" Panunzio re-christened them The Candyhearts. “It’s because of those candy heart necklaces you all wear,” Kix told them. Lead singer Flame howled in protest: “Candyhearts? That’s the corniest name I ever heard.” All the same, it ended up being the one they put on their contract. “We can always change it later,” Archie assured them; but events started happening so fast, there wasn’t time!
JUST LONG ENOUGH TO RECORD
AN ARCHIE RECORDS ALBUM.
The next few months were like a non-stop rollercoaster ride for the Evangelistas: Rehearsing songs and cutting demos; getting fashion makeovers and being fitted for stage costumes; doing publicity photo shoots and interviews; choosing concert repertoire; learning choreography; and finally, making personal appearances booked for them by Big Nipsy Freund, The Archies’ manager.
That’s what they did when they weren’t out partying hard and running the New York streets with a rough crowd! What Big Ethel described as "ghetto scum" started hanging around the office, claiming to be friends of the group. “Are you sure signing these girls was a good idea?” Archie asked his wife. “They damn sure ain’t angels!” Roni shrugged: “They sing like angels, and that’s all I care about.”
But she had to care about how unreliable The Candyhearts were becoming; one of them (most often, Francine) would always disappear just before a show! No-nonsense Veronica laid down the law, and they seemed to get the message. After the sisters began exhibiting professional work ethics, Roni made plans for their début album. “We don’t sing anything better than we sing Motown,” they insisted, and she took note: MOTOWN FOREVER would be a double-length tribute to Detroit’s powerhouse writer/producer team Brian Holland, Lamont Dozier and Eddie Holland, Jr!
Producer Ralfi Chingas would remember The Candyhearts as the most talented female singers he'd ever worked with. The sisters made Holland-Dozier-Holland oldies like "Rock Me For A Little While", "Nothing But Heartaches" and "You Lost The Sweetest Boy" sound like nobody else had ever sung them! Francine in particular knew how to own a song: Babe was masterful at phrasing with her southern-accented vibrato. Sherry Evangelista was also a strong vocalist, and all three of them took to the studio like old pros.
After the office was declared off-limits for street hoodlums, the sisters seemed to have turned over a new leaf, but looks were deceiving. Returning to New Orleans for album sessions put them back in contact with bad influences! Before they could finish cutting the final tracks, police raided the studio: Aqua Vulva, Flame and Sugar Walls were served with drug dealing and solicitation warrants. The drug charges got thrown out, but the other evidence against them was overwhelming!
They were convicted, and Roni was livid: "How dare those hoochies turn tricks on my time?" She could’ve pulled strings to get them off but decided against doing so. Archie agreed that it was best to let them serve their sentences. “They'll only be locked up for a few months, and maybe it will teach them a lesson,” he reasoned. “When the Evangelistas get out of jail, we’ll give them one more chance to show us they’re serious about a music career!”
THE "SUGARBRITCHES" TRIO
SANG BACKGROUND VOCALS
ON ARCHIES RECORDS
IN THE EARLY 2000'S.
SABRINA: FROM FEBRUARY TO MAY 2005, THE ARCHIES RECORDED ANOTHER COUNTRY MUSIC ALBUM IN MEMPHIS. RALFI CHINGAS WAS BUSY WITH ANOTHER PROJECT, SO THEY DECIDED TO PRODUCE THE RECORD THEMSELVES; BUT "HEAVEN HELP THE NON-BELIEVER" WOULD BE SHELVED AMID A BOOTLEGGING INCIDENT! THE BAND HIRED A LOCAL ENGINEER TO SUBSTITUTE FOR AN AILING ALAN MAYBERRY, AND HE PROVED UNTRUSTWORTHY!
DISCOS FUENTES
SINGLES SESSIONS
UNA PRODUCCIÓN ARCHIE AMERICANA
(INSTRUMENTALS + VOCALS)
FEBRUARY 2005
SUN STUDIOS,
MEMPHIS, TENNESSEE
I'M INTO LOOKIN' FOR SOMEONE TO LOVE ME
(UNDERDUB) - lost
(Bayer-Sager, Wine)
incomplete
YOUR HUSBAND, MY WIFE (UNDERDUB)
- lost (Levine, Wine)
incomplete
THE ARCHIES
w/KEVIN KELLER
Arranger: ARCHIE ANDREWS
Producers: THE ARCHIES
Sound Engineer: ISAK CHAUDHURY
Executive Producer:
NICHOLAS FREUND
The Archies commenced recording an album that celebrated
the songs of Toni Wine, one of the primary background
singers on their early recordings. Toni herself was present in the
studio as music supervisor. @ the last minute, she decided
against cutting any up tempo songs for the LP, so these tracks
were re-imagined as a non-album single.
DISCOS FUENTES
ALBUM SESSIONS
"HEAVEN HELP THE NON-BELIEVER"
UNA PRODUCCIÓN ARCHIE AMERICANA
(INSTRUMENTALS + VOCALS)
FEBRUARY/MARCH 2005
SUN STUDIOS,
MEMPHIS, TENNESSEE
incomplete
incomplete
incomplete
incomplete
THE ARCHIES
w/KEVIN KELLER
Arranger: ARCHIE ANDREWS
Producers: THE ARCHIES
Sound Engineer: ISAK CHAUDHURY
Executive Producer:
NICHOLAS FREUND
These were the only Archies recording sessions
that produced no usable sides.
NON-DOMESTIC PROMO SINGLES
PRESSED FOR THE SOUTH-
AMERICAN AND CANADIAN
MARKETS.
DISCOS FUENTES
ALBUM SESSIONS
"HEAVEN HELP THE NON-BELIEVER"
UNA PRODUCCIÓN ARCHIE AMERICANA
(INSTRUMENTALS + VOCALS)
APRIL 2005
SUN STUDIOS,
MEMPHIS, TENNESSEE
THAT'S WHAT LIFE IS ALL ABOUT -
Heaven Help The Non-Believer LP (Asia)
(Levine, Wine)
LOVE ME LAH-DEE-DAY - lost
(Levine, Wine)
I WANNA SEE MORNING WITH HIM -
Heaven Help The Non-Believer LP (Asia)
(Levine, Wine)
I LOVED HIM LIKE I LOVE MY VERY LIFE (UNDERDUB)
- lost (Levine, Spector, Wine)
LOVE ME LIKE YOU'RE GONNA LOSE ME (UNDERDUB)
- lost (Levine, Wine)
I THINK I LOVE YOU AGAIN (UNDERDUB) - lost
(Levine, Wine)
THE ARCHIES
w/KEVIN KELLER
w/LONG TALL WISDOM
w/FRENCHY SKAGGS
w/DILTON DOILEY BRISEÑO
Arranger:
DILTON DOILEY BRISEÑO
Producers: THE ARCHIES
Sound Engineer: ISAK CHAUDHURY
Executive Producer:
NICHOLAS FREUND
There are no surviving tapes from these sessions.
SABRINA: TRY AS THEY MIGHT, THE ARCHIES COULDN'T CAPTURE THE TRADITIONAL COUNTRY MUSIC SOUND THAT SONGWRITER TONI WINE INSISTED ON! IN DESPERATION, ARCHIE FLEW TONY BRISEÑO DOWN TO MEMPHIS TO SALVAGE THE SESSIONS. TONY DID JUST THAT, BRINGING WITH HIM A PAIR OF AUTHENTIC HILLBILLY FIDDLERS AND GUITAR PICKERS: WILBUR "LONG TALL" WISDOM + FERDINAND "FRENCHY" SKAGGS! THEY WERE MEMBERS OF KATZ + THE FIDDLES, RIVERDALE’S MOST POPULAR COUNTRY MUSIC BAND.
DISCOS FUENTES
ALBUM SESSIONS
"HEAVEN HELP THE NON-BELIEVER"
UNA PRODUCCIÓN ARCHIE AMERICANA
(INSTRUMENTALS + VOCALS)
APRIL/MAY 2005
SUN STUDIOS,
MEMPHIS, TENNESSEE
I'M INTO LOOKIN' FOR SOMEONE TO LOVE ME
(OVERDUB)
- single flipside (withdrawn from sale),
Disque D'Or (France)
IF WE BOTH HOLD ON
- single (withdrawn from sale),
End Of A Century box set
(Barry, Wine)
HOLLY, GO SOFTLY
- Heaven Help The Non-Believer LP (Asia)
(Levine, Wine)
HEAVEN HELP THE NON-BELIEVER -
Heaven Help The Non-Believer LP (Asia)
(Bayer-Sager, Wine)
A GROOVY KIND OF LOVE (UNDERDUB) -
Heaven Help The Non-Believer LP (Asia)
(Bayer-Sager, Wine)
TAKE A LITTLE TIME OUT FOR LOVE
(UNDERDUB)
- lost (Levine, Wine)
THE ARCHIES
w/KEVIN KELLER
w/LONG TALL WISDOM
w/FRENCHY SKAGGS
w/DILTON DOILEY BRISEÑO
Arranger:
DILTON DOILEY BRISEÑO
Producers: THE ARCHIES
Sound Engineer: ISAK CHAUDHURY
Executive Producer:
NICHOLAS FREUND
Only the withdrawn-from-sale single masters survive
from these sessions. Toni Wine sang background vocals
with Kevin Keller. The Archies' 2088 END OF A CENTURY
box set, featuring the original version of “If We Both
Hold On” will only be released in Japan.
NON-DOMESTIC PROMO SINGLES
PRESSED FOR THE VIETNAMESE
AND AUSTRALIAN MARKETS.
DISCOS FUENTES
ALBUM SESSIONS
"HEAVEN HELP THE NON-BELIEVER"
UNA PRODUCCIÓN ARCHIE AMERICANA
(INSTRUMENTALS + VOCALS)
MAY 2005
ARDENT STUDIOS,
MEMPHIS, TENNESSEE
A GROOVY KIND OF LOVE (OVERDUB)
- discarded
TAKE A LITTLE TIME OUT FOR LOVE
(OVERDUB) -
Heaven Help The Non-Believer LP (Asia)
LOVE ME LIKE YOU'RE GONNA LOSE ME
(OVERDUB) -
Heaven Help The Non-Believer LP (Asia)
I LOVED HIM LIKE I LOVE MY VERY LIFE
(OVERDUB) -
Heaven Help The Non-Believer LP (Asia)
YOUR HUSBAND, MY WIFE (OVERDUB) -
Heaven Help The Non-Believer LP (Asia)
I THINK I LOVE YOU AGAIN (OVERDUB) -
Heaven Help The Non-Believer LP (Asia)
THE ARCHIES
w/KEVIN KELLER
w/LONG TALL WISDOM
w/FRENCHY SKAGGS
w/DILTON DOILEY BRISEÑO
Arranger:
DILTON DOILEY BRISEÑO
Producer: VERONICA
Sound Engineer: ISAK CHAUDHURY
Executive Producer:
NICHOLAS FREUND
There are no surviving tapes from these sessions.
Veronica caught the engineer, Isak Chaudhury
in the act of bootlegging Archies tracks! When she
fired him, he took revenge by maliciously
sabotaging the session tapes. As a result, the
group's Toni Wine project was scrapped, and
only an acetate of potential song mixes was
left to document it. That acetate will be the basis
of a reconstructed album, to be released in
the year 2098.
SABRINA: THE ARCHIES DIDN'T HAVE TIME TO RE-DO THE ALBUM SESSIONS; THEY HAD A SUMMER TOUR SCHEDULED IN SOUTH AMERICA! IN JUNE 2005, THEY BOOKED A TRACKING DATE IN MEDELLÍN, COLUMBIA AND CUT A SINGLE CALLED “TITTY TWISTER.” DESTINED TO BE A COUNTRY HIT FOR THE CADILLAC THREE, THIS ARCHIE/JUGHEAD/BIG ETHEL COMPOSITION WILL ALSO BE A POSTHUMOUS CHART-TOPPER FOR THE ARCHIES. THAT SONG WAS ALWAYS A SOURCE OF EMBARASSMENT FOR CO-WRITER BIG ETHEL: SHE WAS ADAMANT THAT SHE HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THE TITLE!
THE ARCHIES ALSO TOOK TIME OUT FROM THEIR CONCERT TOUR TO DO SOME ACTING! SINCE THE KIRSHNER YEARS, THEY'D MADE CAMEO APPEARANCES ON TV SHOWS, BUT THIS WAS SOMETHING SPECIAL: A MINISERIES STARRING RITA PHOENIX, THE QUEEN OF COLOMBIAN TELENOVELAS! REGGIE + BETTY LANDED FEATURED ROLES, ALTHOUGH REGGIE'S TIME ON CAMERA WAS LATER REDUCED. "LA DIOSA DEL AIRE" SCORED A RATINGS SMASH AS WELL AS MULTIPLE AWARDS; IT ALSO YIELDED A HIT SOUNDTRACK ALBUM TO WHICH MEMBERS OF THE ARCHIES CONTRIBUTED VOCALS.
THE SOUNDTRACK SONGS WERE ALSO THEIR CONTRIBUTION: SPANISH TRANSLATIONS OF BALLADS INTENDED FOR THEIR ABORTED COUNTRY LP! A STICKY LEGAL SITUATION WITH SONGWRITER TONI WINE RESULTED AND UNFORTUNATELY, IT PREVENTED THE GROUP FROM COMPLETING THAT TRIBUTE RECORD.
WHILE IN COLOMBIA, ARCHIE + VERONICA DECIDED TO LET LAPSE THEIR CURRENT MANUFACTURING AND DISTRIBUTON DEAL FOR CENTRAL AND SOUTH AMERICA. CAPITOL RECORDS WAS THE WORLDWIDE DISTRIBUTOR FOR ARCHIE, BUT THEY AGREED: "CAPITOL-EMI JUST ISN'T GIVING US THE REGIONAL SALES FIGURES WE WANT!" THEY SIGNED A NEW PACT WITH DISCOS FUENTES, THE OLDEST AND MOST POWERFUL RECORD LABEL IN THAT PART OF THE WORLD. THE ARCHIES' ABORTED
COUNTRY ALBUM WAS GOING TO BE THE FIRST FUENTES RELEASE.
RUMOR HAD IT THAT FUENTES WAS AFFILIATED WITH DRUG CARTELS! BIG NIPSY FREUND SHRUGGED OFF THE ALLEGATION: "WHAT MAJOR RECORD LABEL HASN'T HAD TIES WITH ORGANIZED CRIME @ SOME POINT?" HE TOLD ARCHIE + RONI NOT TO WORRY. "GANGSTERS ARE VERY GOOD @ SELLING MUSIC. I COME FROM AN OLD MAFIA FAMILY THAT OWNED SONG PUBLISHING HOUSES, SO I KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!" FUENTES EXECUTIVES STRONGLY DENIED HAVING CRIMINAL CONNECTIONS BUT PROMISED TO DELIVER A STRING OF GOLD RECORDS SOUTH OF THE BORDER. THOSE HITS DIDN'T START FLOWING UNTIL THE FOLLOWING YEAR, BUT THE ARCHIE-FUENTES CONNECTION WOULD PROVE TO BE BOTH VERY LUCRATIVE AND EXCEPTIONALLY LONG-LASTING!
KEVIN KELLER ACCOMPANIED THE ARCHIES + BIG NIPSY TO SOUTH AMERICA. WHILE TOURING IN A COASTAL AREA, KELLY + NICHOLAS RENTED A LAND ROVER AND TOOK SOME TIME TO SIGHTSEE. WHILE EXPLORING A REMOTE BEACH, THEY WANDERED ONTO A GAY PORN SET AND WERE FILMED IN VERY COMPROMISING POSITIONS! THIS FILM FOOTAGE WOULD COME BACK TO HAUNT THEM A FEW YEARS LATER.
DISCOS FUENTES
SINGLES SESSION
UNA PRODUCCIÓN RALFI CHINGAS
(INSTRUMENTALS + VOCALS)
JUNE 14, 2005
DISCOS FUENTES,
MEDELLÍN, COLOMBIA
TITTY TWISTER - single
(Andrews, Chase, Jones, Mason)
THINGS 2 COME
- Disque D'Or (France)
(Mann, Weil)
THE ARCHIES
Arranger/Conductor:
ARCHIE ANDREWS
Producer: RALFI CHINGAS
Sound Engineer:
MIRABELLA de ORGANZA
Executive Producer:
NICHOLAS FREUND
Featuring Juggy Jones on lead, the "Titty Twister" single
will be released in the 22nd century and become
one of The Archies' biggest international hits! Jughead
wrote the music and Archie collaborated on the
lyrics with Big Ethel; it's one of just a handful
original songs that the group recorded in the
21st century.
OF THE VERY FIRST ARCHIES ALBUM
WILL BE ISSUED ON THE 100th
ANNIVERSARY OF ITS RELEASE.
ARCHIE RECORDS
EP SESSION
"ARCHIE IN LONDON"
A STEED-PINTO PRODUCTION
(INSTRUMENTALS + VOCALS)
AUGUST 20, 2005
RED BUS STUDIOS,
LONDON, ENGLAND
BRING A LITTLE LOVIN' - Disque D'Or (France)
(Vanda, Young)
GONNA HAVE A GOOD TIME TONIGHT
(UNDERDUB)
- Complete Fuentes Albums box set
(Vanda, Young)
THE ARCHIES
w/KEVIN KELLER
Arranger: REGGIE MANTLE
Producer: LAURA PINTO
Sound Engineer: STEVE ZUKOWSKY
Executive Producer:
NICHOLAS FREUND
Reggie Mantle sang lead on both "Bring A Little Lovin'"
and "Gonna Have A Good Time Tonight," but his vocals
on the latter song were never completed. Retained in
the archive as an instrumental, it will be used as
the backing track for an unreleased 2013 single
by The Vixens.
SABRINA: LAURA PINTO RAN AN INDIE LABEL THAT REGGIE WAS SIGNED TO BEFORE REJOINING THE ARCHIES. WHEN HE LEARNED THAT SHE'D MOVED BACK TO HER HOME TOWN OF LONDON, HE SUGGESTED THAT THE ARCHIES ASK HER TO PRODUCE AN UPCOMING SESSION SCHEDULED IN THE UK. UNFORTUNATELY, THAT SESSION ENDED ABRUPTLY WHEN VERONICA GOT INTO A FIST FIGHT WITH MS. PINTO!
I DON'T THINK IT WAS ABOUT ANYTHING BUT A PERSONALITY
CLASH, BUT FOR THOSE TWO, IT WAS HATE @ FIRST SIGHT! HOWEVER, AS THE FOLLOWING LOG ENTRY SHOWS, RONI'S ANTIPATHY FOR LAURA DIDN'T PREVENT ARCHIE FROM WORKING WITH HER ON HIS OWN.
SET EVER RELEASED, THE SIX-
RECORD ONLY IN AMERICA WILL
BE CURATED BY DON SEÑORITO
CARTOON! FOR SEVERAL YEARS,
HE WILL HOST THE POP CULTURE
CANTINA PODCAST.
ARCHIE RECORDS
SOUNDTRACK SESSIONS
“BLACK BELT SMACKDOWN!”
A MAMARONECK PRODUCTION
(INSTRUMENTALS)
SEPTEMBER 3 - 7, 9 - 12, 2005
ABBEY ROAD STUDIOS,
LONDON, UK
SMACKDOWN INTRO - unreleased
BOLERO FOR RITCHIE + KARMA - soundtrack LP
AN UNMADE BED - soundtrack LP
SMACKDOWN CODA - soundtrack LP
SMACKDOWN IN NEW YORK - soundtrack LP
WATERFRONT MONTAGE - soundtrack LP
TRAINING ROOM PACHANGA - soundtrack LP
STAND IT LIKE A MAN - soundtrack LP
RITCHIE MEETS JESSE - soundtrack LP
YOU ARE THAT BITCH - soundtrack LP
(Archie Andrews)
THE SUGARTOWN PIPERS
w/THE ROSCOE SHIRLEY STRINGS
Arranger: ARCHIE ANDREWS
Music Director: DAVE BASSETT
Producer: LAURA PINTO
Sound Engineers:
ALAN MAYBERRY, BUDDY SHELBY
Executive Producer:
NICHOLAS FREUND
Salem da Katt: Archie’s interest in Soul music encompassed “Blaxploitation” cinema from the 1970s. There wasn’t a movie scene from that era starring Pam Grier that dude hadn’t committed to memory! And listening to soundtracks from films like "Shaft", "Super Fly" and "Black Caesar" was about as close to musical ecstasy as it got for him; so naturally, when the opportunity arose to not only score but also star in an homage to the Blaxploitation era, Archie couldn’t resist! Never mind that he was a red-headed, freckle-faced Irish/Italian dude that not even a blind man would mistake for Black!
That said, scoring "Black Belt Smackdown" gave Arch the chance to stretch his music arranging skills. Future Archies recordings would benefit from his having done so! His studio guide was none other than Veronica’s new nemesis, Laura Pinto; but Laura was well-qualified, with a history in film and TV music production dating back to the actual Blaxploitation era. Babe also produced the early hits of iconic Soul trio Josie + The Pussy Cats!
The musicians who'd be credited on the record label as "Sugartown Pipers" were some of the finest session players in Great Britain, including members of the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra. However, there initially were no Black players in the mix, and Archie objected: "A Black cast movie with soundtrack music played by nothing but White people? That ain't happening up in here!" The four Afro-Caribbean sidemen who subsequently got recruited were destined for an ongoing relationship with Archie and his label.
FOR ARCHIE RECORDS WAS
BOTH A CRITICAL AND
A COMMERCIAL FAILURE.
ARCHIE RECORDS
ALBUM SESSIONS
"DEEPER THAN THE NIGHT"
AN ARCHIE AMERICANA PRODUCTION
(VOCALS + INSTRUMENTALS)
SEPTEMBER 22 - 24, 2005
ABBEY ROAD STUDIOS
LONDON, UK
EVERY FACE TELLS A STORY
- Deeper Than The Night LP
(Allison, Black, Sills)
DEEPER THAN THE NIGHT
- Deeper Than The Night LP
(Snow, Vastano)
HOPELESSLY DEVOTED TO YOU
- Deeper Than The Night LP
(John Farrar)
MAGIC - Deeper Than The Night LP
(John Farrar)
LET ME BE THERE
- Deeper Than The Night LP
(John Rostill)
A LITTLE MORE LOVE
- Deeper Than The Night LP
(John Farrar)
I HONESTLY LOVE YOU
- Deeper Than The Night LP
(Allen, Barry)
COME ON OVER
- Deeper Than The Night LP
(Barry + Robin Gibb)
VERONICA
w/KATZ + THE FIDDLES
Producer: VERONICA
Sound Engineers:
RONNIE + BUDDY SHELBY
Executive Producer:
NICHOLAS FREUND
Salem da Katt: Fans were constantly telling Veronica how much her soprano singing voice reminded them of Seventies superstar Olivia Newton-John. It was just a matter of time before Roni cut one of ONJ’s hits; that happened in 2002 when she covered “If Not For You”, Olivia’s first international hit single. It was one of the highlights of ARCHIE COUNTRY! Archie + Betty were so impressed, both of them urged her to consider cutting an entire album of ONJ material.
Babe finally got around to doing it in 2005 during a business trip to London. An avowed Disco devotee, Roni gravitated toward dance-oriented tunes like “Physical”, "Twist Of Fate" and "Landslide." Babe wasn’t so crazy about ONJ’s string of Country/Pop hits - they were too sugary for her taste - but Betty warned that she’d ignore them at her own peril! “Her fans will want to hear them,” she predicted, “and yours will, too.”
Just to get it out of the way, Roni decided to cut the "twee" Country material first. Ironically, the only songs that critics would single out for praise would all come from these September dates! Not trusting British musicians to give her an authentic Country sound, Veronica flew in Riverdale’s finest hillbilly band, Katz + The Fiddles, to accompany her. The members were Katz Rockland, guitar; Long Tall Wisdom, steel guitar, harmonica and fiddle; Pencil Pete Drysdale, mandolin and fiddle, Frenchy Skaggs, fiddle and accordion; + Matty Carmine, drums.
TRIBUTE TO EVIE SANDS
IS LEGENDARY!
ARCHIES FAN CLUB RECORDS
EP SESSIONS
"BILLY SUNSHINE"
A SWEET PEACHES PRODUCTION
(VOCALS + INSTRUMENTALS)
SEPTEMBER 24 - 28, 2005
STUDIO "B",
EL PASO, TEXAS
ANY WAY THAT YOU WANT ME - lost
(Chip Taylor)
ANGEL OF THE MORNING - lost*
(Chip Taylor)
I CAN’T LET GO - lost
(Gorgoni, Taylor)
BILLY SUNSHINE - lost**
(Gorgoni, Taylor)
TAKE ME FOR A LITTLE WHILE
- lost***
(Trade Martin)
PICTURE ME GONE - lost
(Gorgoni, Taylor)
BETTY JONES
w/ MARIACHI LOWRIDER
w/THE NASTY BOYS
Arrangers:
ARCHIE ANDREWS, *BETTY JONES,
**FOOLKILLER, ***ROD MACK
Music Director:
FOOLKILLER
Producer:
BETTY JONES
Sound Engineer:
PUNK E. GUTIÉRREZ
Executive Producer:
FAWN ETHEL MASON
Salem da Katt: @ the same time that Veronica was tracking her new solo album in London, her BFF was cutting an EP back in the States. The Archies’ contract with Archie Records specified that members could make solo records for any label they wanted to; this clause was especially important to Betty Jones + Gino Mantle, who wanted to establish independent musical identities.
The Archies Fan Club label was a subscription-only music service launched back in 2003. For a rather hefty fee, fan club members could receive limited-edition singles, albums and EPs pressed up especially for them! Of course, The Archies were AFC’s primary act but Archie + Veronica urged their bandmates and other musician friends to cut solo records. The bait they dangled was ownership of their master tapes! Very often, the bait was snapped up but not always.
For instance, when Veronica asked Gino to record something for AFC, he flat-out refused! So did Betty; but when Archie asked her to do so, she reconsidered. There was a condition attached, though: That she produce the record herself!
The BILLY SUNSHINE EP is Betty’s only documented solo production effort, and one that almost nobody heard. By all accounts, her tribute to Sixties cult singer Evie Sands was fabulous; not only did she sing up a storm, babe played keyboards, rhythm guitar and sax with just a little help from the latest version of The Nasty Boys: Rod Mack + Harvey “Foolkiller” Schwartz on lead and bass guitars, respectively, with Archie on drums. Of course, they also provided vocal backing. In addition, Tex-Mex brass accompaniment came courtesy of Mariachi Lowrider, the house band @ Dilton Doiley Briseño’s Studio “B”.
Mixing the tracks for playback, soundman Punk E. Gutiérrez screamed like a teenage girl! Dude said he felt "chills!" It wasn't the flu: For him, that was a premonition of hits waiting to happen. Nobody doubted that the EP would be a smash; so nobody could understand why it subsequently got shelved!
Decades later, Rod Mack (who subbed for a vacationing Dilton @ the sessions) finally cleared up the mystery. “While cutting those Chip Taylor songs, Betty + Archie discovered that they had . . . well, I'll call them unresolved personal issues," he told me. There were rumors of an affair, but Rod insisted that they weren't true. All the same, their unrequited lust for each other torpedoed the project! Scrapping the BILLY SUNSHINE EP was a symbolic "gesture of faith" to their respective spouses.
According to Rod: "I couldn't believe it: They mutually agreed to erase the tapes, and those wonderful performances were lost forever. I thought it was a damn shame!” So do I. What's wrong with a booty call between friends every now and then?
Rod made copies of the sound mixes for his own enjoyment. Then, without his knowledge, somebody (yours truly!) made copies of the copies, and they circulated in music business circles for years. In 2066, New Archies member Ramsay Khalid Sharma will cut his own versions of these songs after hearing the bootleg mixes. Long before then, Punk E's premonition would pan out: Several of the tunes sung at these El Paso dates will indeed become hits, and Betty will sing them! But that's in the future.
Rod Mack moved to England after this session; dude took a long-term residency @ London’s Scotch of St. James nightclub. Rod later took part in the troubled sessions for The Archies’ GET IT ON TODAY album @ Abbey Road Studios. That's where another case of extramarital lust - this time, acted upon - would be even more disruptive to recording activities!
CELEBRITY DEEJAY DON SEÑORITO
CARTOON WILL CLAIM TO BE
VERONICA'S BIOLOGICAL
GRANDSON, EVEN THOUGH SHE
NEVER GAVE BIRTH TO
A CHILD!
ARCHIE RECORDS
ALBUM SESSIONS
"DEEPER THAN THE NIGHT"
AN ARCHIE AMERICANA PRODUCTION
(VOCALS + INSTRUMENTALS)
SEPTEMBER 29, 30, OCTOBER 1, 2, 2005
ABBEY ROAD STUDIOS
LONDON, UK
PHYSICAL - Deeper Than The Night LP
(Kipner, Shaddick)
WHAT IS LIFE? - Deeper Than The Night LP
(George Harrison)
HEART ATTACK - Deeper Than The Night LP
(Bliss, Kipner)
TWIST OF FATE - Deeper Than The Night LP
(Beckett, Kipner)
XANADU - Deeper Than The Night LP
(Jeff Lynne)
TOTALLY HOT - single B-side
(John Farrar)
VERONICA
w/THE SUGARTOWN PIPERS
w/THE ROSCOE SHIRLEY STRINGS
w/BLUE-EYED SOUL
Arranger/Producer:
VERONICA
Music Director:
PAUL PRESTON
Sound Engineers:
ALAN MAYBERRY, BUDDY SHELBY
Executive Producer:
NICHOLAS FREUND
SABRINA: VERONICA'S FIRST SOLO ALBUM WAS RECORDED FOR KIRSHNER RECORDS IN 1991, AND IT WAS A HIT. DEEPER THAN THE NIGHT SCORED NEITHER A COMMERCIAL NOR MUCH OF A CRITICAL SUCCESS; BUT IT’S AN ESSENTIAL AND PIVOTAL ALBUM IN THE ARCHIE RECORDS CATALOG. THREE IMPORTANT RELATIONSHIPS WERE ESTABLISHED DURING THE RECORDING SESSIONS.
THE MOST IMPORTANT WAS BETWEEN JUGHEAD + KEVIN KELLER, WHOM VERONICA FLEW IN TO SING BACKGROUND VOCALS FOR HER. THE TWO OLD FRIENDS ENDED UP DOING MUCH MORE THAN THAT: WRITING NEARLY ALL THE RHYTHM ARRANGEMENTS AND CONDUCTING THEM, TOO, ALTHOUGH THEY DIDN’T TAKE CREDIT. EFFECTIVELY, THEIR PERFORMING DUO EVOLVED INTO A PRODUCTION UNIT! THIS WAS BLUE-EYED SOUL’S FIRST APPEARANCE ON RECORD AS SUCH, BUT NOT THE LAST.
A BUTT-NAKED TRACKING SESSION
@ ABBEY ROAD STUDIOS!
THE NEXT MOST IMPORTANT RELATIONSHIP WAS BETWEEN VERONICA + GUITARIST JUDI PARISELLA. RONI TOLD HER BRITISH SESSION CONTRACTOR TO BOOK THE BEST FEMALE GUITARIST IN THE UK, AND JUDI ANSWERED HIS CALL. NICKNAMED “MADAME AXE”, SHE WAS REPUTED TO BE THE FEMALE ANSWER TO JIMI HENDRIX! SHE CERTAINLY HAD CHOPS TO BACK UP THE CLAIM; BUT JUDI + RONI DIDN’T HIT IT OFF SO WELL. IT'S A FUNNY STORY THAT I ONLY EVER TOLD TO SALEM, BUT I'M GOING TO TELL IT TO YOU NOW!
FRUSTRATED WITH ORCHESTRA MUSICIANS THAT SOUNDED TOO STIFF, @ ONE POINT VERONICA DIRECTED THE OTHERWISE MALE CREW TO STRIP NAKED. “I WANT Y'ALL TO FEEL THE MUSIC TOTALLY!" SHE DECLARED. "TAKE OFF EVERYTHING. I DON'T WANT ANYTHING COMING BETWEEN YOU, YOUR INSTRUMENTS AND THE RHYTHM.” AN OUTRAGED JUDI PARISELLA REFUSED TO DISROBE, AND THERE WERE SOME TENSE MOMENTS! BUT RONI RESPECTED THAT MADAME AXE HELD HER GROUND, AND BESIDES, SHE HAD NO QUARREL WITH HER GUITAR PLAYING. IT WAS SUPERB!
JUDI SUBSEQUENTLY BECAME A FIXTURE @ ARCHIE SESSIONS CUT IN THE UK, BUT ON ONE CONDITION: THAT SHE’D NEVER AGAIN HAVE TO PLAY IN A STUDIO FULL OF STARK NAKED SIDEMEN! I GOT TO KNOW HER WELL, AND WE OFTEN LAUGHED ABOUT THAT FIRST SESSION WITH RONI. "I DEFINITELY HAVE HAD OCCASION TO WORK WITH DICKHEADS," SHE JOKED, "BUT THAT WAS JUST A BIT MUCH!"
ENSEMBLE COULD ADAPT THEIR
PLAYING TO ANY AND ALL
KINDS OF MUSIC.
THE LAST IMPORTANT RELATIONSHIP INVOLVED THE ROSCOE SHIRLEY STRINGS, A CHAMBER ENSEMBLE COMPOSED ENTIRELY OF ANGLO-CARIBBEAN MUSICIANS. SALEM HAS TALKED ABOUT THEM A LITTLE BIT: THEY GOT BOOKED FOR THESE SESSIONS WHEN RONI NOTICED THAT THE SUGARTOWN STRING SECTION HAD DEVELOPED A HABIT FOR EXTENDING THEIR TEA BREAKS. “Y’ALL CAN TAKE A PERMANENT BREAK,” THE INFURIATED HEIRESS INFORMED THEM. “I DON’T TOLERATE LAX WORTH ETHICS FROM ANYBODY!”
ARCHIE SUGGESTED THAT SHE REPLACE THE SLACKERS WITH A STRING SECTION THAT HE WAS USING ON HIS BLACK BELT SMACKDOWN SOUNDTRACK. “THERE ARE ONLY FOUR OF THEM,” HE TOLD HIS INCREDULOUS WIFE, “BUT WHEN HERSCHEL, NELSON, BROOKSY AND ROSCOE PLAY, THEY SOUND LIKE A THIRTY-PIECE SYMPHONY! YOU JUST WON’T BELIEVE HOW GOOD THEY ARE.” RONI LOVED HOW THE SHIRLEYS INTERPRETED HER MUSIC ARRANGEMENTS, AND THAT WAS THE DECIDING FACTOR IN THEM BECOMING BRITISH SESSION REGULARS.
A RELATIONSHIP ALSO ENDED @ THESE DATES: AN EXTRAMARITAL AFFAIR THAT VERONICA HAD BEGUN WITH JUGHEAD IN MEMPHIS A FEW MONTHS EARLIER. IF ARCHIE + BETTY HAD BROKEN THEIR MARRIAGE VOWS, IT SURELY WOULD'VE BEEN NO MORE THAN A ONE-NIGHT STAND; BUT THIS WAS A SERIOUS CASE OF CHEATING! IT NEVER SHOULD'VE HAPPENED!
TO HEAR THEM LOCK HORNS OVER THE YEARS, YOU'D THINK JUGGY + RONI DIDN'T LIKE EACH OTHER BUT THE OPPOSITE WAS TRUE: THERE WAS AN UNREQUITED ATTRACTION BETWEEN THEM. ARCHIE NEVER NOTICED IT, BUT I CERTAINLY DID! SO
THE INEVITABLE FINALLY HAPPENED, AND IT WAS ABOUT MORE THAN PHYSICAL LUST.
JUGGY HADN'T HAD SEX WITH BETTY FOR MONTHS DUE TO A PAINFUL MEDICAL CONDITION SHE PERIODICALLY SUFFERED FROM; AND RONI WAS STRUGGLING WITH INFERTILITY ISSUES! THEY BOTH HAD DEEP EMOTIONAL NEEDS THAT THEIR MARRIAGES HAD FAILED TO SATISFY; BUT INFIDELITY WASN'T THE ANSWER.
THEY REALIZED THE ERROR OF THEIR WAYS, BUT DID SO TOO LATE TO STAVE OFF NEGATIVE CONSEQUENCES: BELATEDLY, THEIR AFFAIR BECAME KNOWN TO THEIR RESPECTIVE SPOUSES. IT WOULD BE THE GREATEST TEST THAT ARCHIE, RONI, JUGGY + BETTY'S FRIENDSHIP HAD EVER WEATHERED!
ARCHIE RECORDS
SINGLES SESSIONS
AN A LO LATINO PRODUCTION
(INSTRUMENTALS + VOCALS)
NOVEMBER 8 - 11, 2005
STUDIO "B",
EL PASO, TEXAS
I'D LOVE YOU TO WANT ME
- End Of A Century LP
(Roland Kent LaVoie)
ANGELIQUE - Disque D'Or (France)
(Mann, Weil)
HOUSE OF GOLD - Disque D'Or (France)
(Barkan, Phillips)
IT NEVER RAINS IN CALIFORNIA
- Disque D'Or (France)
(Hammond, Hazlewood)
THE ARCHIES
w/MARIACHI LOWRIDER
w/DILTON DOILEY BRISEÑO
Arranger/Producer:
DILTON DOILEY BRISEÑO
Music Director:
FOOLKILLER
Sound Engineer:
PUNK E. GUTIÈRREZ
Executive Producer:
NICHOLAS FREUND
Betty Jones sang duet vocals with Reggie Mantle
on "I'd Love You To Want Me" and "It Never Rains
In California" (a snippet of which is heard in the 2006
Can-Am film PASTERNAK.) Betty sang lead on "House Of
Gold" and Reggie’s lead voice featured on "Angelique." Roni
Lodge-Andrews didn't attend this session and didn't hear
the tracks until early 2006. @ that time, she judged
them "too Tejano" for The Archies' Country Pop
fan base. Betty + Kevin Keller will cut a second
version of "I'd Love You To Want Me" in
September of 2033.
REGULAR USO TOURS, BOTH
BETTY + VERONICA BECAME
POPULAR "PIN-UP" GIRLS
WITH US MILITARY
PERSONNEL.
SABRINA: AS A HUSBAND-AND-WIFE SINGING DUO, BETTY + JUGHEAD HAD LOADS OF APPEAL! THEY SOUNDED AS GREAT TOGETHER ON STAGE AS THEY DID ON WAX: THEIR SPECIALTY NUMBER WAS THE ROLLING STONES OLDIE "TIME IS ON MY SIDE." SINCE MARKETING BLUE-EYED SOUL HAD PROVEN TO BE A NON-STARTER, ARCHIE HOPED TO SIGN THE JONESES AS AN ARCHIES SPINOFF ACT. THIS TIME, BETTY WAS THE OBSTACLE! SHE DIDN'T THINK THEIR VOICES BLENDED WELL. "MY ALTO NEXT TO HIS BARITONE," SHE COMPLAINED, "SOUNDS LIKE TWO GUYS WITH DROOPY MUSTACHES HARMONIZING IN AN OLD-TIMEY BARBERSHOP QUARTET!"
SHE MUCH PREFERRED REGGIE AS HER DUET PARTNER. THE NOVEMBER SESSION IN EL PASO WAS SCHEDULED @ HER REQUEST SO THAT ARCHIE COULD HEAR HOW COMMERCIAL THEIR VOCAL BLEND WAS. WHILE THE DUET PLAYBACKS WERE GOOD, THEY WEREN'T OUTSTANDING, EITHER; THE BAND CONSENSUS WAS THAT REGGIE'S VOICE DIDN'T COMPLEMENT BETTY'S PARTICULARLY WELL. YET SHE CONTINUED TO RESIST SINGING WITH JUGGY! IN FACT, SHE GREW EVEN MORE RETICENT. TONY BRISEÑO CONFIDED TO ME THAT, IN HIS OPINION, THERE WAS MORE TO HER RETICENCE THAN MUSICAL CONSIDERATIONS. DID SHE SUSPECT WHAT WAS GOING ON BEHIND HER BACK?
ARCHIE RECORDS
ALBUM SESSIONS
"MOTOWN FOREVER"
AN A LO LATINO PRODUCTION
(VOCALS + INSTRUMENTALS)
NOVEMBER 16 - 19, 2005
STUDIO “B”,
EL PASO, TEXAS
LEAVING HERE - unreleased*
IN AND OUT OF LOVE - unreleased**
WHEN THE LOVE LIGHT STARTS SHINING
- unreleased***
FOREVER CAME TODAY - unreleased****
THE CANDYHEARTS
(BIG ETHEL + THE VIXENS)
w/MARIACHI LOWRIDER
w/BREE SPELLMAN
Vocal Arrangers:
SHERRY EVANGELISTA, FAWN ETHEL MASON
Arrangers:
*ROD MACK, **BREE SPELLMAN,
***DILTON DOILEY BRISEÑO,
****ROD MACK, BREE SPELLMAN
Music Director:
FOOLKILLER
Producer:
DILTON DOILEY BRISEÑO
Sound Engineer:
PUNK E. GUTIÉRREZ
Executive Producer:
NICHOLAS FREUND
Salem da Katt: When you want to be famous, there’s really no such thing as bad publicity. I mean, look @ all the rappers with known criminal records; it makes them more popular, not less! Veronica was sure that news of The Candyhearts’ incarceration wouldn't hurt their marketability; but unfortunately, the group went to prison and never came back! While serving their time, the Evanglista sisters gave up on their soulful diva dreams, each for different reasons.
Angry @ Arch + Roni for not bailing them out, Francine "Flame" Evangalista declared that she was no longer interested in being an Archie Records artist. She flat-out refused to return to the studio, and so did “Aqua Vulva.” Edna Evangelista was dreaming of a domestic life: A former pimp had promised to marry her, and she believed him (much to her later regret)! As for Sherry "Sugar Walls" Evangelista, she left prison a spiritually-transformed woman. Having converted to Islam behind bars, she decided to turn her back on Rock ‘n’ Roll; but unlike her sisters, the woman soon to be known as Reyhanna Muhammad felt obliged to honor her recording contract.
That meant completing the unfinished Candyhearts album. Sherry sang on the final four selections, but not as lead vocalist: She found the song lyrics "un-Islamic!" Big Ethel sang lead instead; Sherry joined Ember Roslindale and Jelli Jones-Torres of The Vixens + Sabrina on background harmonies. Then, sadly, she walked out of the recording studio and never set foot in one again! The Andrews chose not to litigate, releasing all three women from further contractual obligations.
Even though there was now no group to promote the LP, Archie felt strongly that MOTOWN FOREVER should be released: “Nobody’s got a voice like Flame Evangelista, and the sisters' harmonies are unreal. Radio will eat this album up with a spoon!” Roni was less certain of that. She opted to designate the record a tax write-off! “We spent so much money on The Candyhearts,” she argued, “it’s the only sure way to recoup our investment.”
FORSYTHE JEROME PASHINGU
"JUGHEAD" JONES
The decision was taken out of their hands when the sisters’ vocal tracks mysteriously went missing! It was as if somebody had wiped them right off the master (and actually, somebody had). Archie audio tapes were kept in the securest of locations, so sabotage was unlikely; there must've been some kind of recording malfunction, but nobody could fathom how or when it had happened!
Over the years, other Archie artists tried to cut new vocal tracks but something always went wrong: Bad timing, wrong pitch, inexplicable volume problems! And nobody could match Flame Evangelista’s original phrasing. There was talk of auditioning a new Candyhearts group, but it came to nothing. Much later, the post-Big Ethel Vixens would fill the girl group void on Archie Records' roster; but as good as they were, they couldn’t measure up to The Candyhearts!
The former Sugar Walls went on to become a female imam for a reform mosque. Tragically, Edna “Aqua Vulva” Evangelista was put back on the streets by her pimp; she ended up the victim of a brutal murder in 2012, committed by a crazed "john." Younger sister Francine came under the influence of a voodoo priestess in prison, who informed her that she possessed latent witchcraft powers. Little did Archie or Veronica suspect that one of her early spells was responsible for the sabotaged album master!
Only one person who took part in the MOTOWN FOREVER sessions knew, and she had the power to reverse that malicious spell; however, Sabrina chose not to do so. You'll understand why when you reach the end of this musical journey!
SABRINA: FRANCINE "FLAME" EVANGELISTA BECAME THE MADAM OF A NOTORIOUS NEW ORLEANS BROTHEL, AS WELL AS THE GIRLFRIEND OF LOCAL MOBSTER JACK SERNA. FRANCINE + JACK'S DAUGHTER WILL GROW UP TO BE A POWERFUL SORCERESS; CARMEN SERNA WILL ALSO BE A SALSA MUSIC QUEEN WHO TURNS TRICKS ON THE SIDE! IN THE YEAR 2048, BILLIONAIRE JASON BLOSSOM WILL BE REVEALED AS HER REAL BIOLOGICAL FATHER. (JASON'S FREQUENT INVOLVEMENT IN ARCHIE-RELATED EVENTS IS NOTHING LESS THAN BIZARRE!) I WILL PERSONALLY AUDITION AND REJECT CARMEN FOR MEMBERSHIP IN THE NEW ARCHIES, WITH DIRE CONSEQUENCES FOR BOTH THE GROUP + MYSELF . . . BUT THAT'S AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT STORY!
"TEAR DROP CITY"
THE ANDREWS AND THE JONESES DEAL
WITH THE AFTERMATH OF MARITAL
INFIDELITY IN THE YEAR
2 0 0 6 !!!
